Thursday, October 8, 2009

The red and the black

I love how, now that I'm pregnant, The Child suddenly up and grows a stubborn streak and a will and a strong desire to party all night long. So my only coping tool is... lying on the couch and feeling sorry for myself. Or insane housework. It really depends on the day and what kind of mood Crazy Pregnant Lady is in. Seriously, though, I nearly shot myself last night. Three hours of Not Sleeping, for no apparent reason. She was tired, she was not in pain, she was not hungry. Milestone, perhaps? It doesn't help that I have a cold. Because I am a sissy now, colds just knock me flat. I remember just a few years ago, a cold was no big deal. Now I'm all, "I'm DYIIIIIIING!" and "MELODRAMA!" and "CAPS LOCK WHINE WHINE CAPS LOCK!"

She did do very well for a couple weeks there, and I almost caught up on sleep. I even scrubbed all the floors in the downstairs and vacuumed twice, which is pretty much unheard of. It was a very good couple of weeks.

There are box elder bugs everywhere here. Yesterday, I felt like I was in an X-Files episode--the one with the robotic cockroaches, and YES, that IS a real episode, and one of the characters' names IS Bambi, and I love it, thank you very much--, with every move I made monitored by the box elder bug hive mind. I'd walk into a room, and see on sitting on the wall above the doorway, probably staring at me. I'd go into the laundry room, and there another one was, hanging out on my sink, probably whispering discreetly into a tiny wrist watch. I walked to Piggly Wiggly (WORST grocery store name EVER, by the way, except for Sooper Dooper in Winner, SD) and at least seven managed to throw themselves under the stroller wheels. I do not know what they were trying to accomplish.

They don't really bother me as individuals. Its their omnipresence that freaks me out. I fully expect to wake up tomorrow morning to find my entire house pulsing under a red and black carpet of legs and carapace.

These are the things that happen to your brain when you watch too many sci-fi/horror shows.

Okay, I was going to make this longer, but I just realized The Child is actually sleeping for this nap, and I think that means I can attempt the same. Yay!

(cue screams... NOW)


  1. Sorry about the poor sleeping! Not any milestone I know of... perhaps an early attempt to assert her "I am the first child, pay attention to me" now that she's going to be a big sister? My toddler is always pretending to be a baby to get attention, maybe your baby is pretending to be a newborn to get attention. Just be glad she's not pretending to be an unborn and trying to climb back into your uterus.

    I had to use Google Images to figure out what box elder bugs are. You're right, they're not so bad on their own, but I can see being inundated with them as kind of scary. You don't, for instance, have a few of them in a cage somewhere, and the rest are attempting to free them? No? Maybe that was an Alfred Hitchcock movie. That, or maybe The Child has them!

  2. Oh, I just meant that maybe she's on the verge of a milestone (standing/walking, I'm thinking, or maybe speech; she just started saying "cat" yesterday). Her sleep often suffers when she is. This was the worst night since she was about three weeks old, though! I do have a feeling that when the new one comes, we'll have a lot of nights like that with her to begin with. She's very independent, will play by herself all day, but every five or ten minutes needs me to pick her up and snuggle her for a short bit.

    I can totally see The Child hoarding some bugs somewhere, possibly saving them for snacks. She is a really weird kid. I bet they're under her mattress.

  3. Oh, right, about the milestone. I've heard that when they learn to pull themself to a stand or when they start walking, things like that, they wake themselves up trying to practice it at night. At least my little one seems to be holding off a bit on that milestone, she's cruising but not walking yet.

    Congrats on the new word! "Cat" was my toddler's first word, funny enough. I think my little one "might" be saying "Mama," but it's hard to tell! She says the word, but does she mean me, or is it just a sound? I'm sure you know.

    My little one has developed an addiction to acorns. They must be the yummiest things on Earth. Digging them out of her mouth constantly, but she always finds another one. Less gross than bugs, I suppose, although at least bugs aren't a choking hazard. :)