And then. This year. I'd been a bit glum since the cloudier, cooler weather started (this is before I started shoveling in vitamin D like it was candy--10,000 IUI/day is apparently what it takes to make me happy). I got a bizarre hankering for some Christmas music, so I decided to see what Pandora had to offer.
My favorite version ever of any Christmas song ever is sung by--get this--The Barenaked Ladies and Sarah McLachlan:
It is utterly perfect in every way. And I don't even like Sarah McLachlan since all the rage about her a decade or so ago (her voice is lovely, but I'm so tired of it).
So this is the song I plugged in to get my Christmas station started. There have been many good songs and many good artists. But then there are the hordes of breathy, overwrought emotional Christmas hymns or rocked-out, overwrought Christmas hymns, and it makes me want to scream.
There are two kinds of classic music that I like.
1. The original version.
2. A fresh, new version that still stays true to the spirit of the original. Please don't tell me that "O Holy Night" needs an electric guitar or breathy arpeggios. Or that "Silent Night" needs to be wailed at the top of your lungs.
So what does Pandora give me?
Breathy, flowered-up or rocked-out versions of old Christmas classics. OVER AND OVER AGAIN, despite me hovering over the computer every chance I get, plugging in thumbs up and thumbs down for every song I have a strong reaction to.
Me: Oh, what a lovely version of "Oh Come Oh Come Immanuel." LIKE.
Pandora: SIIII-III-LENT NII-II-II-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-GHT [where each "I" represents a part of the amazing scale this singer can sing], HO-HO-HOHOHOHOHOLY NII-II-II-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-GHT...
Pandora: Personally, I really love this extremely twangy group of musicians who pronounce their Rs like they're trying their darndest to hold them in their mouth with their teeth until the Second Coming. You sure you don't want to give them another shot?
Pandora: Okay, I'll throw you a bone. How's this for bizarre? Annie Lennox singing the most beautiful, haunting rendition of "Lullay Lullay" that you have ever heard. Enjoy crying into the soup you're cooking for your little tiny babies.
Me: *sniff* LIKE. A LOT. BUT IT'S SO SAD.
Pandora: Fine, how about something cheery like "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
Me: Are you listening at ALL? HATE.
And so on.
If you can sift through the horrible stuff, Pandora does come up with real gems. If you like really strange ladies singing about terrible tragedy.
I dare you not to cry.