Thursday, July 26, 2012


I make myself a shake every morning for breakfast. Yogurt, protein powder, spinach, banana, cocoa powder, and berries. It's better than it sounds, and I actually stay not starving until lunch, which is a small miracle.

So I go through a lot of berries. Lots and lots and lots of berries. And it's friggin expensive. Fresh berries cost dollars per ounce, and even frozen berries are pretty expensive at most stores (if you go through a half a cup a day). So I found these at Costco for, like, nothing, and because I'm so excited about how cheap they are, I choose not to question their origin. Which is probably why I never really looked at the packaging:


Nature's Three Berries. Tell me, does this sound both inaccurate and a little defensive?

Aren't there more than three berries that occur in nature? Avocados are berries. So are grapes, persimmons, tomatoes, strawberries, and about a thousand other things. Or are these Nature's very favorite berries, like Nature gave birth to hundreds of different kinds of berries and these are her three special children.

I feel like "nature" should really be in quotes. Perhaps these berries are really hatched in the bowels of some alien spacecraft, aliens whose only demands are tribute in the form of unwanted Costco employees. I bet Scully is running around a Kirkland factory right now, freeing all the no-shows and pot smokers.

I also just found this picture on my photobucket account. This is what Emmy does with her sandwiches when she feels that simply not eating them is not protest enough:


I swear I did not teach her this.

No comments:

Post a Comment